Case of the Ex
My case of the Ex is much different from Mya's. She has a case where her boyfriend cant cut off all ties with his ex, My case of the ex has more to do with My Ex Not wanting to cut off his ties with ME!
When I break up with a guy, I'm not the "Let's be friends" kind of girl. I'm more of the "Delete your number, delete you from my myspace, facebook, block you on twitter, change my e-mail, Screen name, etc", type of girl (giggles). Losing all contact with an ex is how I get over them, or stop being angry about the situation in a timely fashion. I don't like to hold on to people or grudges. They're Ex's for a reason ladies.
I sign on myspace maybe once or twice a week, but because I'm on spring break and in Atlanta doing absolutely nothing; I found myself going through friend requests, perusing through messages that I had previously ignored or let build up, and laughing at comments, and pictures of people I know posing for party flyers.
I ran across a myspace message from "the X", and a friend request (because I had deleted him post relationship) with a little note on the side saying "wassup". In the first message, he goes on and on typing about how he finally got his life together and is pursuing his career as a rap artist....Um Ok. I say "Thats Good" and leave it at that.
The next Myspace message reads as follows (his name omitted):
Mar 19, 2009 5:15 AM
RE: (His name)
i know i messed up wit you, but dat don't mean we cant be friends right ma? We been cool since forever and been through mad shit, its me (his name) so act like you know me. and i know i dont wanna lose you as a friend shenda.
I have been down the "friendship with an Ex" road before and trust me it's not easy nor is it pretty; especially if you guys had serious feelings for each other. There's going to come a time when he starts dating again or confiding in you (his friend) about stuff that may be grueling to sit there and listen to. Eventually it gets UGLY. Me and "The X" weren't talking because of complications in our friendship post relationship. Why try it again?
So....I totally disregard the entire message, even though; YES we have been through alot together, and YES we have known each other for years, but there comes a time when you just have to let stuff go.
People come, People go, and if we hold on to certain people, grudges, and unfortunate events for the rest of our lives we'll end up a "bag Lady" as Erykah Badu Says.
"One Day, All them bags gon' get in yo way" --Erykah Badu
With all that being said, ladies and gentlemen never give seasonal people lifetime expectations or roles in your life. If they are meant to be there forever and ever they will be. Stop holding on. Let it go and let it all fall into place.