Shit is fucked up. I'm trying to be tough but, there's a crack forming in the foundation somewhere. I literally lose about four people a year. Some people have never even been to a funeral. But, I guess I was born to know death. I was born literally nine months after my Dad's Mom passed away. Went to Barnes + Nobles with the intention to purchase some sort of reference guide on Blaxploitation films and screenwriting and ended up leaving with another sad Toni Morrison novel instead. My Stepdad didn't make it and my little sister is in denial. She subtlely snapped at my Mom when she attempted to explain to her that he had crossed over. I'm nervous about the authenticity of that strange looking Jetblue popup window I'd never encountered before when purchasing plane tickets. Especially nervous because I'm still waiting to receive my e-ticket confirmation via email over an hour later. Tootsie just keeps on barking and it's driving me crazy. And I'm cold and can't concentrate on anything else but, the advantages and disadvantages of life. Glad I'm by myself. Just want to be left alone. Someone texted me today sharing their condolences but, I don't know who it was. I just responded thank you. I know they meant it. So, thank you again if you're reading this.

It was hard for me to listen to this song. My Stepdad loved this song. I'll never forget how proud of me he was for completing this magazine.


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