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Yesterday morning I laid in bed next to the only guy that I can stand to be around. Or can stand to be around me. The television was on the only channel he seems to watch, its amazing to me how often ESPN plays Sportscenter. We laid there his leg thrown over mine, being super self conscious of our morning breath, laughing and talking. I got up to prepare lunch for the day and he went to take his shower. All I can think about is how long can this last without knowing where exactly I stand.
He insists that Im more than just a friend, but he's not ready to be in a relationship. Earlier this week, we fought hard, my inner frustrations showing, I threatened to leave him alone, he threatened to leave me alone. And at the moment where I felt myself begin to tear up, my thoughts getting the best of me, he came into the kitchen singing "Lions, Tigers and Bears" by Jazmine Sullivan. I snapped back into reality when he hugged me and kissed me behind my ear as he came to the chorus "...but Im scared of loving you..." I smiled.
I thought of an interview I did, when I asked about relationships, he said "I just enjoy life...If people try to define and articulate their activities, things then become complicated..." How true does this ring?

1 comments

Kwan Lee said... @ March 14, 2009 at 11:52 PM

She's back.......

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